Last week I auditioned for a group specializing entirely in traditional Christmas carols. After spotting an ad posted in Seattle Craigslist and following the cybertrail to the website belonging to Portland's version of the group, I looked it over. The group sounded fairly promising: large number of singers but they only sing in quartets; busy holiday season, and...(drumroll) costumes!
As I perused the Seattle site as well as Portland's, however, I also learned that the groups perform mostly at private parties and events (not my favorite venues - I like singing for the public), and it's expected that the singers won't have any other committments (beside work) during the holiday season. This raised a few red flags but I still felt as though I should audition just for the experience.
It turned out they were holding auditions the next weekend. I booked my slot, then started having second thoughts. The week ahead was unusually busy, both on the job and elsewhere, and I'd have very little time to prepare. I also hadn't been singing challenging music regularly since my last ensemble disbanded over a year ago.
But still - costumes...
I practiced as much as I was able, given the week's business, and chose a carol with a simple and familiar melody. On Sunday I went to the audition site, read the info sheet and filled out the app form. At the question, "From Thanksgiving through December, can you clear your calendar of everything not related to work?" the red flags started swishing madly. Still, I'd driven all the way over there and even had my work schedule rearranged to accomodate the time slot. When someone called my name, I went in.
The director ran through a vocalizing exercise that barely covered an octave. I sang the first verse of my song - not my best work; the key I chose was too low and my voice cracked on one of the notes. Then he and his assistant told me that 15 women were auditioning for a couple of slots (subtext: don't get your hopes up); no tenors or basses had signed up to audition this year, so the ranks of sopranos and altos were very full already (why wasn't I surprised?), and they'd be in touch shortly. The whole thing, start to finish, was over in less than 10 minutes.
After arriving home from work that evening, I followed my gut feeling and emailed the director to ask that my name be taken off the list. The whole experience had felt sort of impersonal, and without a chance to actually visit a rehearsal, I'd no way of knowing whether I'd like being part of it.
The following day I received an email informing me that I hadn't made the cut - the standard "We had many fine voices and it was difficult to decide" letter - but I'd already moved on. I suspect that my mind, knowing that the group wouldn't be a good fit, forced the rest of me to cooperate by tripping me up during what was a pretty easy audition by most standards.
And I'm grateful for it.
